To my fellow citizens of North Dakota. Not the ones who live in Fargo but the ones who live in places that are so far out in the sticks it doesn’t really have a name. Firstly, so sorry that the big fat New York con artist that you love so dearly, so perfectly, has had the election stolen from him. Darn, bummer. We’re sorry that we didn’t do some thing about him during all those years when he was stinking up New York City. Don’t worry, we’ll get the next one!
About that virus that the lame stream media keeps harping on that doesn’t really exist that’s killing more and more of your friends and neighbors and family members every day. You may have heard it was real bad here in NY in the spring, unimaginable. Refrigerated morgue trucks lined up outside hospitals, nurses and doctors breaking down weeping from bottomless exhaustion and unending death. Death in space suits with strangers. An assembly line of death. Kind of like it’ll be all over the country and in your neck of the woods in a couple weeks (if it isn’t already).
I know you don’t believe anything that you see with your eyes unless you read it online from someone you don’t know and it sounds crazy, so I won’t waste my time lecturing you about staying away from crowds and wearing masks.
But here in Gotham we aren’t taking any chances. I plan to see the spring next year, will you?
